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Mason

James family, New Orleans, Nutjobs, One Idiot is Offended, Restaurants, West Allis


Some of you may remember this story, in which (Sponsor's Name Here)'s Official Son, Mitten, grabbed a foul ball away from Poor Timmy at a Brewers game, which caused a domino effect in its wake.

But that story was completely made up (well, except that Edwin Encarnacion actually hit a foul ball that Mitten recovered. That part actually happened)

However the story below is true.  And in 2012, who the heck knows if names are actual or made-up anymore.


CiCi's Pizza held a national Customer Appreciation day on Thursday, September 6th, with all buffets $2.99 each (Side note; the normal price is $5.49 for an adult buffet, so although the percentage of savings is significant, it really is just a couple of bucks off the regular price).

With My-Sugar-Na tending to an appointment, I took the girls to CiCi's for dinner.  As I had expected (though hoped differently) the line was out the door.  But because I learned in New Orleans that "Line food is good food", we were going to wait it out.  Within minutes, (Sponsor's Name Here)'s Official Stepdaughter, Sloppy saw one of her friends in line, and that friend invited both Sloppy and (Sponsor's Name Here)'s Official Daughter, Gooey to enter and eat with them.

That left me alone in the back of the line.

Sometimes, being left alone isn't too bad, and Thursday was one of those days.  I had had a lousy day at work, but the sun was shining, the weather was gorgeous, and figured that I could handle waiting with the crowd.  And I was right, except for Mason.

Don't get me wrong, I did wait in line for 45 minutes before I hit the cashier, and there were lots of kids in line.  Kids that can only see hips and butts of the people in front of them, and in this MTV / Game Boy world of ours, don't have 4.5 minutes patience in them, much less 45 minutes.  But most of the kids were either well-behaved, or acted within reason of a bored child (Side note; a 7-year old that was not named Mason kept me entertained for much of that time.  He started by telling me that the Sport Clips across the parking lot now cuts girls hair, that he likes Tae kwon Do, hopes they aren't out of pizza dough [because I told him they might be] and has a Russian single mother who works jobs at odd hours. Hey, for a 7-year old, this kid was pretty cool.)

About three families ahead of us in line, though, was Mason.  He was maybe 6-7-8 years old, quite a scrawny thing, but his T-shirt might have well read "Future Bully" than the name of a school.  He was antagonizing the two other kids in the group who didn't appear to be immediate family.  As the line inched forward, Mason decided it would be fun to turn on the hose spigot, which inconveniently was NOT attached to a hose.  His mom - preoccupied with others in the group - turned around and yelled "MASON!" and watched as someone else turned off the spigot.

And that was that, with mom being ambivalent that three others had gotten their shoes wet.

When we got closer to the door, though, is where the fun started (Side note; try to picture this line along the front of the building, and the glass door opens into the line.  The line has to hold the door open and walk around the open door to enter the restaurant.).  The other two kids in the group - maybe a year or two younger than Mason - had brought some plastic toys and were generally entertaining themselves.  When they wouldn't share the toys, Mason took the boy by back of the head and, WWE-style, rammed his head into the glass door.  The boy screamed, the boy's mom checked him over to make sure he was OK, and Mason's mom yelled again "MASON!" and looked at him meanly.

That is all she did.

Then life went on with the back half of the line muttering phrases like "If that were my kid..." and "Can you believe Mom didn't do anything" and "That kid's not going to turn out well".


Thankfully I will be dead before he is running the country.  But when he is, we all have Mason's Mom to thank.

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