I work very hard and am attending college to obtain my degree in the Human Service field. Writing makes me feel alive and gives me the opportunity to touch those whom I would not be able to otherwise. Last but not least, I have been blessed with two amazing daughters who love me completely and support my dreams. Feel free to contact me with questions, concerns or feedback.
It’s time to tackle the subject which makes the faintest of bloods boil. Cheating.
One. Word. Says. It. All.
Whether it is a family member, friend or partner, we’ve all been cheated one way or another. For those who vow commitment, sexual cheating is among the top 1 offense. Putting the toilet seat down, forgetting to fold the laundry, nothing compares. Let me tell you why.
When a man and woman commit, at least one partner believes that they are committing completely; mind, heart, body, privates parts, hands, mouth, and soul. Rarely do we discuss our own definitions regarding cheating, straying or adultery.
Prior to committing to your current partner, did it ever cross your mind that discussing sexual expectations and desires was just as important as finances, religion, cleanliness and children?
Most assume their partners are on the same page regarding the bedroom. This couldn’t be further than the truth.
Case in point; one woman believes that strip clubs cross the line while another believe that flirting is harmless on both sides. Without discussing your thoughts, desires and ideas with your partner, we are leaving ourselves open for failure.
I believe in marriage, monogamy and partnership. I also believe that being single allows one the opportunity to take a walk on the wild side. Whichever you reside, it’s most important to know first and foremost what you desire prior to diving into the area known as sex.
“Had I known she would refuse me, I would have never gotten married.” This has been uttered by more men than not. This being a possible truth, why even go there? Why not leave well enough alone? It’s not law you must be married, I mean, from what I hear, we have freedom of choice regarding that as well.
Prior to removing your clothing, it is pertinent that you discuss your wants and needs. Expecting your spouse to know your desires or read your mind is asinine. Your body and hot spots are completely new to your partner; he or she cannot certainly expect to take care of business without even the simplest of directions.
Because no so many are unable to express or are confident enough to keep the lights on, many are left dissatisfied.
A couple of questions to ponder; do you share your fantasies with your partner? Are you open minded and willing enough to color outside the lines? If your partner had a new and exciting position, would you accuse him or her of cheating or would you say, “Let’s do it!” Eagerness and the ability to feel safe allow us to be ourselves in and out of the bedroom.
That said, let’s move on to the cheating part. Because so many have sexual desires unknown to their chosen partner, most go outside of the committed relationship to satisfy their needs. Pornography is at an all-time high. One click of a mouse allows us to dive privates first into a world of depravity. What was once vanilla has turned into a tornado of chaos. The most willing partners are now competing with individuals not only skilled in the profession but willing to go further for a greater profit. It’s a lose-lose situation for everyone, especially the smallest victims; the children.
It starts with a look, a need, a desire, a touch, a word. The minute one acts upon and pursues is when the cheating begins. Cheating doesn’t occur within a second; it is planned, calculated and decided over a period of hours, days, months and years.
Men and women who betray their partners are cowards. They don’t deserve a second, third or fourth chance. Not sure how many STD’s it takes to change one’s mind, but I am praying it’s prior to one which may eventually end your life.
It’s no secret I use Plenty of Fish as an avenue for dating. FIFTY PERCENT of the emails and winks I receive are from married men. Don’t believe me, create a fake profile and take a gander. Married men do not post pictures. Their relationship status is MARRIED and they have no shame in sending pictures of their face and junk to any girl who asks. I refuse immediately, but it’s the God’s honest truth.
If you suspect your spouse is cheating, create a fake profile on a dating website or post a casual encounters ad on craigslist. Within a matter of minutes you will receive emails and photos along with the “Oh woe is me, my wife and I no longer have the intimacy we once shared.” If your spouse is unfaithful, it may take a day or two, possibly even a week. Make sure you cover your tracks and clean your internet history immediately after your daily search. Better to be safe than sorry.
Next week: Falling in love? Maybe!